The Gym Bro And His Knee Cartilage

Scene: A gym in Eugene, Oregon. Kadija is sitting on a bench, observing the people around her with the same energy as a detective solving a case. A guy—mid-30s, muscular, but clearly forcing himself through a painful squat—grits his teeth as he rises. His knees sound like someone slowly crumpling a bag of chips. Kadija raises an eyebrow and speaks up.

Kadija: [Calmly, sipping water] That’s the sound of your cartilage begging for mercy. You do realize that, right?

Gym Bro: [Panting, confused] Huh?

Kadija: Your knees. That crackling sound? That’s the last of your joint cushioning whispering its final words. Tell me, what exactly is your goal here?

Gym Bro: [Wiping sweat] Uh… leg day?

Kadija: Fascinating. And is “destroying my knees before 40” part of the regimen, or is that just a bonus feature?

Gym Bro: [Nervous laugh] Nah, I mean… I gotta push through, right? No pain, no gain.

Kadija: Ah. The classic nonsense slogan. Tell me, when was the last time you checked out about knee cartilage? Or, let me ask—do you know what cartilage is?

Gym Bro: [Blinking] Uh… it’s like, the cushiony stuff in joints?

Kadija: [Nodding] Close enough. Now, did you know that once it wears down, it doesn’t regenerate? Ever? So when you’re 45, walking like a rusty shopping cart, just know that it all started here. Right now. With this nonsense.

Gym Bro: [Looking down at his knees like they just betrayed him] Damn. So, what am I supposed to do?

Kadija: First, stop squatting like you’re trying to summon knee surgery. Second, strengthen your joints, not just the muscles around them. Mobility work, tendon care—ever heard of that?

Gym Bro: [Shaking head] Not really…

Kadija: Of course not. You all just come in here, lift heavy things, grunt, and hope for the best. And then, 15 years later, you’re out here walking like a retired pirate, wondering where it all went wrong.

Gym Bro: [Laughing but slightly concerned] Okay, so what do I do?

Kadija: You stretch. You warm up. You actually learn how joints work instead of treating your body like an experiment in reckless durability. You want strength? Build longevity, not just ego. Otherwise, enjoy your future knee braces and regret.

Gym Bro: [Nods slowly, absorbing the reality check] Damn. You should, like, teach this stuff.

Kadija: I do, but it’s also called common sense. Your body is not meant to be senselessly treated like it’s a machine that needs buffing. That’s the quickest way you cut things short for yourself.

Kadija goes back to sipping water. Gym Bro stares at his knees, questioning all his life choices.